Six months later.....

Had an MRI and couldn't wait for neuro to review the following week so begged radiologist to give me scoop. As suspected, still have hole in my head although not large enough for brain or fluid to sink into where the hole would close and trap brain. Settle down on colorful commentary. Good news is I don't have to have another afternoon in the tube followed by booting up contrast for another SIX MONTHS. Bad news, will still have headaches, flying will be painful, and my trapeze artist FB has to deal w shagging @ ground level......

Cleveland Rocks - well it did this night!

One of my very dear friends got married this weekend. Very excited for her and albeit pathetic and selfish, rather disappointed it wasn't me...i actually always wanted the fairy tale wedding with all the pomp and circumstance galore. now after being in, planning, and attending hundreds of weddings i would rather a small ceremony followed by a decadent and thrilling soiree - amazing dinner, fantastic wines, and never ending dancing. can you imagine what my wedding would be like given how many friends i have in the industry? colin cowie and martha are rookies and their ideas rather passe when it comes to the amount of talent i have at my disposal. of course all that talent would lead to chaos, cat fights, one upping, levels of control freaking beyond any mere mortals, and a rather blown budget. jesus murphy! maybe i should start dating again before i enlist my friends to prepare for my wedding - it would be amazing and fun though!

back to Traci & Michael's wedding...getting cleared to fly was presented with several caveats:

get a good night sleep prior

take your pills - the really good ones

lay down and rest upon arrival

don't push it

reality: went to a launch party for Sex and the City

had dinner with friends at Monterrey Bay Fish Grotto (mistake - not even worthy of a dining critique entry)

finally packed at 2am

slugged down a really lackluster bloody mary with friends prior to boarding

had a pill with bourbon chaser followed by zoning out to iPod

Plane was small (2&1 seater) so the flight was rather bumpy and ear popping - great......flight attendant was rather curious for my request for an ice bag. Finally got to CLE and booted up breakfast, BM, and bourbon - so not a good combo. we all ended up car sick after the 20 minute serpentine roller coaster taxi drive from hell. note to self - never ask an east African where to find the strip clubs. explored the big city of and stayed up until 2am catching up with friends, last minute wedding details - a great night!

saturday morning we visited the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame - architecture is amazing and exhibits were cool. Elvis being the most extensive.

they had a lovely ceremony in a church with more stained glass that St. Patrick's cathedral. it seems Cleavland has as many churches per capita as we do lawyers. Reception and dinner was fun, dance filled, and great memories. her family embraced all of us and dad even mentioned us each by name in his toast - tear jerker with even more laughs!

i did catch the bouquet. rather more of a staged coup than it being fate that i was the chosen one out of a sea of pink, silk, and hairspray shrouded single women. no such luck on being next, think my CHI friend will be making the leap soon!

incredibly happy for Mr. & Mrs. Marinelli. out of all the weddings, it was definitely a 9-laughs, tears, great friends cavorting as we do, and we never left the dance floor.

return flight on much larger plane which meant much higher altitude. a pill (or two) and ice bag later, all was good.

Yup - ready for Mexico in July.

Hello again, its been awhile....

hope this entry finds you well. personally, I am 300% improved health wise! ruling some issues out although to be expected - pretty sure the cadre of specialists did not inform me of the length of recovery nor all these rather annoying pop up concerns.

this is the best i have felt in 12 months time. have lost 42 pounds (only 10 more to go for "ideal" weight). started back at the gym in march which has certainly been a factor in my health improving - its not all about the super model lifestyle i've adopted (sparkling water, tic tacs, smoking a pack a day).

i cannot wait for the day when i can sit down and enjoy a fabulous dinner and revel in the all the tastes, smells, feel of a perfect pinot noir wrapping around my tounge, and the stir of deep and comical chats with my dining companions. not to say i have survived only on jello and ice chips these past six months or not enjoyed dinner with friends and family....i finally i gave up on worrying if it was all going to come back up. just don't want to waste a culinary journey.

work is GREAT - love my job. i meet at least seven new people a day - now if i can just get them to book at my hotel! this whole economic slowdown is rather impending doom. i get it - its real. it just seems its more of a frenzy verses actually in play.

looking forward to getting back to blogging and hearing about your adventures!

take care!

Erin Go Braugh early!

Had a great girls weekend. Went to St. Pat's Parade in Olde Town Alexandria. Of course we started with bloody mary's - had a make your own bar set up in the back of my car - best tailgating car ever built! The bottom of the back area lifts out to be a little picnic table. Believe me; it has been wonderful during polo matches - it's hard to get the candelabra and champagne bucket steady on just a picnic blanket.

My friend Lorna's brother is the publican of O'Connell's where we had a really fun lunch- great live band and random bag pipers who stroll in for a complimentary pint after the parade.

Ahhh...mothers milk! Still not up to typical beverage consumption par levels ergo two was my limit. Although Guinness does have medicinal properties!!!

Ended up playing pictionary until 3am! Girls v: guys and we spanked them! Second match guys did win - although rather confidant they cheated - notice two of them have the same hand motions….

And the hits just keep on playing.....

Endocrinologist not thrilled with blood test/hormone levels, however nothing can be done – just need to wait it out. He wants to rule out thyroid (levels are spiked however within range) and gallbladder issues– weight loss is not typical with pituitary tumor (lost 35 total and 10 since I saw him jan 3)– plus I have family history for GB and thyroid. So, on to ANOTHER doctor – I swear this is making me a hypochondriac! Current setback worst case scenario is damage to pituitary or they didn’t get all of tumor – will know more after MRI review on Thursday with neurosurgeon. I'm not worried – all of this seems to be part of healing process, and as stated earlier, clearly I am NOT a good healer, in addition to being most impatient!

I am more concerned about some friends who are going thru much worse than me (than I???) - damn, we are getting old! I have lit more candles this past six months than in my entire life! When i joked with my friend David if lighting candles crossed religions, he responded with their menorah exploded - obviously it translates!

"Fasten your seatbelts. It's going to be a bumpy night!" (or week...)

There have been some weird results from recent tests. So back to drawing board and hope to god (or whom/whatever you pray to) not operating room!
Friday - blood work; Monday – appointment with hormone specialist (endocrinologist) to review test results. cross fingers that this is just a minor setback and I do not have to be on drugs the rest of my life; Tuesday – appointment with ENT to review test and CAT scan results, followed by a delightful cocktail of contrast for and afternoon MRI (not the kind of "nooner" I prefer), concluding with regurgitating said contrast; Thursday – appointment with neurosurgeon to review MRI results; Friday – checking into Betty Ford based on conclusion of above doc appointments!!!!! I can be reached at tmcnamara@bf.com. or at my new job tmcnamara@victoriassecretlingeriemodel.com (only 13#'s to go to reach ideal weight!). Please, no photos or interviews until optimum viewing….

Rather have a bottle in front of me then a frontal lobotomy (budumpba!)

Doc decided to not repack my brain!!! One more MRI, one deeper probe and this whole saga will be over-pending I pass. If MRI shows any leaking, infection, or swelling then he will place a layer of silicone like substance over the surgerical field - either way, NO PACKING of brain. Been having chats w/ brain & p-gland (suck it up buttercup, get in the game, cowboy up) and think they're on board! No strenuous exercise or flying yet. Shagging was not on the not allowed list this time; however either was bungee jumping, bull riding, flying on a trapeze (all of which are on my bucket list) – guess he compiled all the above into strenuous exercise.

We had a really great chat about the whole project brain probe. Although he is not completely satisfied with my healing, he wants to include my case into a study that he and neurosurgeon hope to have published. It is amazing how many people actually have a tumor, and not just impacting pituitary, that don’t find out until its too late; meaning there is some form of damage, or they are on autopsy table. Dr. Lee commented on how they had completed three similar surgeries in November and five in December, and none in January – really slow month. I returned with “Gee, don’t know why biz has slowed down – I’ve referred all my friends with brain base tumors to you”. He had to step away from the nasal/brain probe in fear of piercing my frontal lobe, whereby killing me, when he started laughing. Thank you, I’ll be here all week!

Also discussed the cost of surgery and socialized medicine. Out of the $34k+ hospital billed insurance, he only gets a very small portion of the hospital’s cut– he makes more money on office visits than surgery, and since this is a fairly new procedure, it is coded as experimental so he gets half of what he would get %wise on fixing a deviated septum, for example. Obviously he is not a big supporter of socialized medicine, yet he and his colleagues are at least investigating more options for prescription meds i.e. purchasing from foreign vendors to cut down costs for the patient.

These last two weeks have been the best I have felt since the diagnosis. I still have headaches, some blurry vision at night, bright lights and loud noises still pierce my head; however I am getting less exhausted by the end of the work day or doing chores. I am ready to get back to gym, riding my bike (with a helmet designed by NASCAR if I can find one!), and normal levels of cavorting. Still not ready to hit Vegas or party circuit although have been getting more comfortable with the lounge scene.

Thank you again for your support, positive thoughts, and laughs!